Parents are responsible for the majority of their children’s time, so it is up to them to teach them good manners. It is also up to parents to foster sensitivity towards other people.
Despite being considered old-fashioned, having good manners makes kids more likable, and helps them work well with others.
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Be Patient
When teaching children good manners, it is important to be patient. It takes time to learn and develop good habits, and kids often need repeated reminders about basic etiquette like saying please and thank you.
It is also a good idea to take a look at your own behaviors and set a positive example for your kids. Evaluate how you greet people, whether it be in person or over the phone, and how you treat others around you. Kids will often mimic your behavior, so it is important to model politeness.
It can also be helpful to break down etiquette skills into smaller parts and work on them one at a time, says Windsor.
For instance, you can focus on table manners before moving onto other etiquette skills such as asking for permission to open doors or talk on the phone. This way, your kids will feel less overwhelmed and can learn and practice a new skill more easily.
Be Specific
Rather than addressing manners in general, it’s important to teach children specific skills for each situation. This allows them to feel more confident and gives you a sense of accomplishment when they demonstrate these skills.
Some examples of this include greeting people and speaking to them politely, asking permission before using something that’s not yours, saying please and thank you, waiting your turn to speak, keeping your belongings neat and tidy, and apologizing for mistakes. You can also encourage them to help others, such as opening doors for people and writing thank you notes.
Of course, the best way to teach kids good manners is to set a great example for them. Evaluate your own behavior and make sure you’re demonstrating respect for friends, family, and strangers on a daily basis.
Children will learn from you, so be careful about the messages you’re sending. Also, be aware that even when you’ve been consistent in teaching your children proper etiquette, they may occasionally forget or need a reminder.
Be Consistent
It takes time to learn good manners, so it is important for parents to be consistent with their expectations. Children are more likely to accept that their behavior matters if they know that it will be monitored and reinforced by their parents.
For example, if you tell your children not to interrupt others while they are talking, it is important for them to understand that you will consistently remind them that this is rude.
Providing your children with consistent reminders and a variety of different strategies can help them develop good habits for socializing. In addition, it is important to praise good behavior as much as possible so that children can develop a positive self-image and feel proud of themselves.
Try keeping a “Caught You Being Good” jar and rewarding your kids for their politeness and courtesy. This will help them build positive social behaviors that they will carry with them throughout life.
Be Respectful
Every parent dreams of raising a polite and well-mannered child. It’s not an easy task, though. Good manners are essential for children’s growth in all areas of life, but they’re especially important for learning and communication skills.
Kids learn more from what they observe than from anything you say, so set a positive example. Evaluate your own behavior and make sure you’re treating family, friends, and strangers with courtesy and respect.
When your kids exhibit rude behaviors, step in and address them right away. For example, if your children interrupt others in conversation or do not acknowledge them when they speak, tell them it’s rude to talk over others.
Teach them to ask permission to borrow or use something from someone else. Also, encourage your children to offer a seat to an elderly person on public transportation or in a waiting room, to volunteer together at a soup kitchen, to call and check in on grandparents and elderly neighbors, and to shake hands when greeting people.
